• Hi, I am the owner and main administrator of Styleforum. If you find the forum useful and fun, please help support it by buying through the posted links on the forum. Our main, very popular sales thread, where the latest and best sales are listed, are posted HERE

    Purchases made through some of our links earns a commission for the forum and allows us to do the work of maintaining and improving it. Finally, thanks for being a part of this community. We realize that there are many choices today on the internet, and we have all of you to thank for making Styleforum the foremost destination for discussions of menswear.
  • This site contains affiliate links for which Styleforum may be compensated.
  • UNIFORM LA CHILLICOTHE WORK JACKET Drop, going on right now.

    Uniform LA's Chillicothe Work Jacket is an elevated take on the classic Detroit Work Jacket. Made of ultra-premium 14-ounce Japanese canvas, it has been meticulously washed and hand distressed to replicate vintage workwear that’s been worn for years, and available in three colors.

    This just dropped today. If you missed out on the preorder, there are some sizes left, but they won't be around for long. Check out the remaining stock here

    Good luck!.

  • STYLE. COMMUNITY. GREAT CLOTHING.

    Bored of counting likes on social networks? At Styleforum, you’ll find rousing discussions that go beyond strings of emojis.

    Click Here to join Styleforum's thousands of style enthusiasts today!

    Styleforum is supported in part by commission earning affiliate links sitewide. Please support us by using them. You may learn more here.

How to strike up a conversation with doctors/lawyers/engineers?

FidelCashflow

Distinguished Member
Joined
Oct 15, 2007
Messages
4,304
Reaction score
48
I was reading a book on networking that said that in for each profession, there's a list of common questions people in a profession throw at each other to get to know each other in social settings and appear knowledgeable.

For example since I'm an accountant, I know people usually ask "Do you work in public practice or in industry?" "What firm are you with?" etc, and usually if they answer public practice, they proceed to share a gripe about the hours.

Any such tips on chatting with doctors, lawyers, and engineers?
 

tor

Senior Member
Joined
Oct 25, 2009
Messages
391
Reaction score
0
Originally Posted by FidelCashflow
I was reading a book on networking that said that in for each profession, there's a list of common questions people in a profession throw at each other to get to know each other in social settings and appear knowledgeable.

For example since I'm an accountant, I know people usually ask "Do you work in public practice or in industry?" "What firm are you with?" etc, and usually if they answer public practice, they proceed to share a gripe about the hours.

Any such tips on chatting with doctors, lawyers, and engineers?


What's wrong with just asking them what kind of <profession> they are and going from there?
 

Helix

Distinguished Member
Joined
Jun 26, 2009
Messages
1,069
Reaction score
1
To an engineer: &quot;You sir look like a fashionable man who keeps up with the current trends. Could I interest you in a bespoke pocket protector?&quot;
 

FidelCashflow

Distinguished Member
Joined
Oct 15, 2007
Messages
4,304
Reaction score
48
Originally Posted by tor
What's wrong with just asking them what kind of <profession> they are and going from there?
There's nothing necessarily wrong with it, but the wrong questions will just label you "clueless outsider" as opposed to someone more astute that they'd want to talk more with. Going back to the accounting example, if someone responds to me saying "I'm an accountant" by saying "Wow... you must be good at math" in my head, I'll just think to myself "ughh... this is going nowhere." You ask the wrong questions... you look silly and ill-informed. If you ask the right questions, you look like an astute insider. Everyone would rather talk to the astute insider than a clueless outsider.
 

AR_Six

"Sookie!"
Joined
Jun 22, 2007
Messages
10,709
Reaction score
230
Asking what firm you're with for lawyers is basically immediately steering the conversation towards professional stratification. X firm is better than Y firm, or X firm landed a deal, or Z firm lost one of their big commercial litigation guys, etc etc etc... I would steer clear of that altogether and just talk about the news or sports. You're not allowed to talk about files in-depth anyway. You could talk about the area in which they practice, but if they're on the corporate side don't expect that to be terribly interesting to an outsider.

Hell, even if they're not, do you really care about recent developments in search &amp; seizure? Few do... I couldn't interest the honeys with that ish, and I know's it.
 

tor

Senior Member
Joined
Oct 25, 2009
Messages
391
Reaction score
0
Originally Posted by FidelCashflow
There's nothing necessarily wrong with it, but the wrong questions will just label you "clueless outsider" as opposed to someone more astute that they'd want to talk more with. Going back to the accounting example, if someone responds to me saying "I'm an accountant" by saying "Wow... you must be good at math" in my head, I'll just think to myself "ughh... this is going nowhere."

You ask the wrong questions... you look silly and ill-informed. If you ask the right questions, you look like an astute insider. Everyone would rather talk to the astute insider than a clueless outsider.


Well it's slightly unreasonable for any lawyer, doctor, engineer, or otherwise rather specialized professional to expect every person with whom they converse, interesting and worth talking to or not, to be an "astute insider". There's such thing as being an astute outsider, wherein you can ask questions that aren't pitifully stupid (e.g. wow, how good at math are you?) without knowing all about the ins and outs of an orthopedic surgeon's occupation.

That's what I'm saying.
 

FidelCashflow

Distinguished Member
Joined
Oct 15, 2007
Messages
4,304
Reaction score
48
Originally Posted by tor
There's such thing as being an astute outsider, wherein you can ask questions that aren't pitifully stupid (e.g. wow, how good at math are you?) without knowing all about the ins and outs of an orthopedic surgeon's occupation.

Sounds like we're saying the same thing... I just want to know what questions to ask and what questions to avoid sounding pitifully stupid. Sometimes I'll walk into a room full of engineers or doctors, and I'd just like to have one or two opening lines in my back pocket if everyone else is talking shop and I'm lost for words.
 

Rambo

Timed Out
Timed Out
Joined
Oct 3, 2007
Messages
24,706
Reaction score
1,347
Doctors - what type of medicine/field are you in?

Lawyers - what type of law do you practice?

Engineers - what type of engineering are you in?

When they answer, ask them a question about their specific field. Ex:

Doctor - I'm in plastic surgery

you - interesting. I just read a piece that said plastic surgery is up due to people wanting to look better for job interviews.

then just take that and run with it.
 

Huntsman

Distinguished Member
Joined
Jul 3, 2004
Messages
7,888
Reaction score
1,002
As an engineer, I always ask what discipline a fellow engineer practices (usually I have an inkling though). The follow up is then one of an infinite number that depends on my familiarity with the field. There's no way I could relate all of that to you, nor a way in which I could expect to have that information for all but a very limited number of fields. As a law student, it seems the de rigeur icebreaker question for other law students is "what was your undergrad?" but I suppose that would hardly be as appropriate for working attorneys. One useful thing though: different fields tend to label their sub-specialties differently, and knowing that particular term will at least prevent you from coming off a total outsider. I'd never ask an engineer what type of engineering he does, I'd ask in which discipline he practices. In law I think it is more like 'area of practice,' in medicine it's 'specialty.' ~ H
 

Connemara

Stylish Dinosaur
Joined
Mar 9, 2006
Messages
38,388
Reaction score
1,828
worst_thread_ever.jpg
 

Mr Herbert

Distinguished Member
Joined
Oct 29, 2009
Messages
1,646
Reaction score
10
Engineering, best to steer clear from talking about work as much as possible for fear of boring everyone within a 10m radius. If you want to get them animated, ask about their favourite brewery.
 

Eccentric

Senior Member
Joined
Jul 16, 2008
Messages
610
Reaction score
3
As an engineering student, I wish you luck striking up and maintaining a decent conversation with an engineer.
 

lawyerdad

Lying Dog-faced Pony Soldier
Joined
Mar 10, 2006
Messages
27,006
Reaction score
17,145
I think you should employ the tactics recommended by the serious playas in the various &quot;how do I talk to a girl?&quot; threads.
 

Douglas

Stupid ass member
Spamminator Moderator
Joined
Aug 17, 2007
Messages
14,243
Reaction score
2,166
Engineer: A train leaves Chicago travelling east at 85mph, bound for Buffalo. Simultaneously, in Buffalo, a circle begins to be circumscribed around a square with sides of 224 pixels on a 386-generation PC in Adobe Photoshop 1.3 running on Windows 3.11. There is an engineer on the train, and another in the computer lab in Buffalo. Will either get laid before you realize I am making fun of you?

Doctor: So, seen any ********* lately? (If it's a female doc ask her how big the biggest cock she's ever seen on an operating table was).

Lawyer: You're probably best not making fun of the lawyer.
 

Helix

Distinguished Member
Joined
Jun 26, 2009
Messages
1,069
Reaction score
1
Originally Posted by Eccentric
As an engineering student, I wish you luck striking up and maintaining a decent conversation with an engineer.

+ trillions
 

Featured Sponsor

How important is full vs half canvas to you for heavier sport jackets?

  • Definitely full canvas only

    Votes: 96 37.9%
  • Half canvas is fine

    Votes: 91 36.0%
  • Really don't care

    Votes: 29 11.5%
  • Depends on fabric

    Votes: 42 16.6%
  • Depends on price

    Votes: 38 15.0%

Forum statistics

Threads
507,113
Messages
10,593,994
Members
224,360
Latest member
throbgorkas
Top