superfutureman
New Member
- Joined
- Feb 25, 2020
- Messages
- 2
- Reaction score
- 9
I believe this outfit is so terrible that it needs a public critique. We will start from the top. The glasses combined with your hair cut make you look not dissimilar to Dana Carvey in The Master of Disguise in his "turtle man" costume.
The long coat's too big on you. The shoulders are too wide and the sleeves are FAR too long. We can see the crumpling of the sleeves even in the upper arm. The fact that the extra length is not pooling around the wrist or elbow indicates that you actually stacked the sleeves "aesthetically" to absorb the length throughout the entire sleeve. That adds another level of awkwardness to this photo and the outfit itself. On top of that, when compared to the other components of this outfit the formality of the coat and it's length comes across as disjointed. This does not look like purposeful juxtaposition of streetwear with formalwear and the sizing issue does not come across as purposeful. Rather - it just feels like an amateur failure in styling.
The snakeskin jacket beneath the coat appears to fit well, however it's inclusion in this outfit from a styling perspective is embarrassing. Even based on this photo alone, and ignoring your 4,000+ posts of awkwardness, we can tell you are not the type of person who can pull off a snakeskin jacket!!! You are not Marlon Brando nor an authentic "bad boy" who might feel at home wearing this. Rather it looks like an inauthentic costume on you, something a fruity man may wear to a party. But since you do not have the outward confidence of that kind of boy this just looks uncomfortable on you and out of place.
The exposed watch to include in the photograph is mind-boggling since the resolution of the image is so low that we cannot see any detail of the piece except that it is perhaps a mid-market piece, (perhaps from Seiko or something similar???), and that you are trying to display it to your audience either out of a 2012-era menswear convention or you are hoping someone asks you what it is because You. Need. Attention. Both could be probable here.
The braided belt dangling beneath the jacket is perhaps the most laughable part of this entire mess of an outfit. You chose to use a heavily textured belt material for contrast and have dangled a somewhat long but not overly excessive length to gain attention. It is relatively phallic (though over endowed) suggesting that you have some form of insecurity about your genital size. The katana edge cut is the icing on the cake: referencing your love of Japanese culture in a infantile attempt at expressing your (false) worldliness.
Cropped wide pants are the least offensive part of the outfit as they are a Reddit r/malefashion meme, adapted from the Gen-Z streetwear crowd, whom sadly are now much TOO young for you to relate to with your rapidly aging face and hairline. They have most likely been chosen to showcase your Nike Air Force 1, a pair of sneakers which are no longer relevant in streetwear (for at least five years!!!). On top of this they are so obviously fresh and new it is clear you wanted an excuse to wear these barely worn mistakes in your closet and they clearly neither match any of the other pieces in colorway, silhouette or aesthetic and instead end up sticking out like a sore thumb. They are the first thing we see because of their size and stark white contrast to all the black in the outfit.
Finally, bringing it all together, you have chosen to perspective distort yourself as a subject either by positioning the camera very low to the ground and tilted up, or through image editing, to try and make yourself look taller. This has had the effect of making your head look SIGNIFICANTLY smaller than how a normal person is proportioned. The impression is not of someone tall in stature but instead of someone very -ordinary- in height, whose self-awareness of this fact and resulting insecurity has led them to go to such lengths as to try and defraud your audience on social media by using such ineffectual tactics.
You need to re-evaluate your relationship with social media and clothing in general... There are perhaps quite a number of other people on this forum suffering from your plethora of neuroses who could perhaps see this critique and relate to it as a wake up call. You on the other hand will very probably be too embarrassed to ever post here again and frankly I think that is probably the best result (For everyone.)
