I keep buying clothes I think I like, a few months later I hate them

[chrlsful]

I am reading the responses

we can still discuss this among ourselves
L O L

 

[cottontop]

I hear you bud but still want my attire to reflect myself and knowing some of my past girlfriends I'm not sure I'd trust their judgement ; ]

Well then, maybe we need "a queer eye for the straight guy."

 

[A.D.]

Having an identity crisis because you stared too deeply into your wardrobe is 100% real and I relate more than I'd like to.

 

[chrlsful]

not sure it’s helped our Pal as he aint been back. I
appreciate the comments, myself.
Nother forum I posted abandoning ties as even tho still in the board room, seeking ‘something else’. Open neck (still w/sports coat or suit) seemed disrespectful/loss of credability. Tried some ascots, cravats. Been going well. May try non-button downs next (open collar but quite high). I enjoyed yrs of “turtle necks” & want to try scarfs next.

All this is by way of the same. Find what you like. Enjoy. Express ur self. There IS no men’s fashion. Just the 3 or 400 yr old traditions. Break out of that. Dont go too wild (Super Fly, etc) as it looks silly in most settings. But take whats there and personalize it...
8^ )

 

[HotDilf]

Trying to go from 0% to 100% is futile - slow down and enjoy the process.

The Springboard Wardrobe

Podcast: Blamo! - 2024 Wardobes and Listener Questions - from the 12th minute, it addresses precisely your question.

Pick one part of your wardrobe and go learn everything about it. Check high-end, low-end, and vintage shops. Once you've tried enough things, you'll know what you like.

For me, it was knitwear. When I first put on a Loro Piana baby cashmere crewneck, something clicked. And when I compared it to a high street knit, the difference is obvious. I'm not going to spend $150 on an affordable cashmere jumper because I know I'll never wear it. I'd rather have a more expensive sweater that makes me feel good every morning.

 

[Zekaa]

Two further suggestions:

Try to research every term you encounter in order to understand the conceptual implications. "Dark academia" has been mentioned. It's an aesthetic fueled by nostalgia, a romanticized past, so no contemporary cuts and combinations are desirable here. There's Ivy Style from the 1950s as one important inspiration. As Bruce Boyer writes in "True Style": "The period 1945 to 1965 was the golden age of the classic “campus shops,” stores that had built a reputation for catering to the sartorial needs of those with EEE (Eastern Establishment Elite) aspirations, adresses d’or such as J. Press, the Andover Shop, Langrock, Chipp, and Brooks Brothers. These wonderful clothiers were first situated in the cities and towns where the great universities were located: Harvard, Princeton, Yale, and the
other Ivy League schools." So you have a rather limited inventory of design options for sport coat detailing, shoes, sweaters, shirts etc. that can help to give you an exact clue on how an item should be designed to be authentic in that style. For a Dark Academia adoption you just have to cut out the happy aspects of Ivy, for example the cheerful summer madras. You can also go one step further back in history to British country clothing, which even has a wikipedia article. Leave the deer rifle aside for Dark Academia. Both English Country House and Ivy Style live by the term that "new is vulgar". The useful advice to buy vintage can be put alongside the advice to own and wear things for a couple of decades to get the same patina that preworn things already have.

Another suggestion contradicts with what some have posted here: I wouldn't just cauciously approach an outfit. I have made the counterintuitive observation that, sometimes only if you fully commit to a look, the single items can melt together and feel natural, even when they didn't when worn halfheartedly. If wearing a tie feels too flashy, consider an expensive one. Add a pocket square on top – and the tie won't stand out any longer. It's basically the fedora guy problem: If you combine it with a t-shirt, it will look awkward. If you go all in and get the traditional outerwear, you won't end up looking like yourself at the beginning, people might call you Sherlock Holmes, but – that's not the worst, is it?

 

[chrlsful]

sorry Zekaa, every thing post #36 is just what I’m trying to avoid. A fashion 'given a name', some thing from pop culture, much like the site (ascribed), a uniform, Y I have wrote "there is no men’s fashion. We wear what we like, fit or not fit in w/the trendy or the old skol. Comfortable, expressing our own (individual) style. I think I said it in post #30 so will leave it for now.

 

[RodrigueAyotte]

Dark Academia wasn’t actually terrible - as far as that sort of thing went. To the extent that its prep/trad-influenced vibe might have turned some kids onto more classic style (not to mention reading), I’d take it over, say, goblincore any day.

 

[Fishbone]

Trying to go from 0% to 100% is futile - slow down and enjoy the process.

The Springboard Wardrobe

Podcast: Blamo! - 2024 Wardobes and Listener Questions - from the 12th minute, it addresses precisely your question.

Pick one part of your wardrobe and go learn everything about it. Check high-end, low-end, and vintage shops. Once you've tried enough things, you'll know what you like.

For me, it was knitwear. When I first put on a Loro Piana baby cashmere crewneck, something clicked. And when I compared it to a high street knit, the difference is obvious. I'm not going to spend $150 on an affordable cashmere jumper because I know I'll never wear it. I'd rather have a more expensive sweater that makes me feel good every morning.

So I have thought about this idea of a springboard wardrobe for a long time considering I am in the midst of a move with my family from Japan. I currently mostly wear wool trousers or Chino pants when I am casual, I have never been a denim guy although I own a pair. As Derek Guy alluded to it is very much true indeed that you are either one or the other(I am a Chino trousers guy), but I have severe FOMO over Japanese denim which has been so hyped up outside Japan. Would you say buying premium jeans, e.g. Full Count 0105 that might interest me in wearing jeans would be similar to you spending on your Loro Piana Sweater? Or are sweaters something that you have always been into wether it was Lan expensive Cashmere from Loro Piana or not?

Since I have almost no interest in wearing my $70 Levis or $100 Edwin but I do read ALOT about Japanese denim and the heritage and quite honestly feel bad about not owning one despite living and growing up here.

 

[KOz]

sorry Zekaa, every thing post #36 is just what I’m trying to avoid. A fashion 'given a name', some thing from pop culture, much like the site (ascribed), a uniform, Y I have wrote "there is no men’s fashion. We wear what we like, fit or not fit in w/the trendy or the old skol. Comfortable, expressing our own (individual) style. I think I said it in post #30 so will leave it for now.

Nothing exists in a vacuum. The style you create is the result of various things you've been exposed to. You might say you don't care for named styles or trends, but you are influenced by them. Nothing you've ever come up with was conjured up out of nothing.

"We wear what we like" is also only true to a point - people often want to belong and be part of groups that they identify with.

 

[chrlsful]

sorry sad state of affairs then I’d say. Looks like a uniform, all are alike. If I have to dress to fit in it helps me wonder if thats who I wanna "fit in with”? Seems pretty shallow?
Thanks for the reply. I thought no 1 wanted to engage...
“...Nothing you've ever come up with was conjured up out of nothing...."
So true. I dont sew, pattern make, etc. (Like the argument ‘no 1 ever made a new song, all the notes have already been written’). It seems that for a short while (since Y2K?) outside of work (office) more men have started to dress individually. Work is a separate world where one must meet expectation or risk loss of face (judgment, capability. However a dandy in the garage might have his work questioned too). But I have begun to see variation, self expression, a bit of change. I advocate more.
Not to the extent of women (haute couture often just looks weird to me. Like some car designs, thank goodness, much never makes it into the market). But why not more @ work (again, most guys here - ‘the office’)? My lill incursion above, the cravat, ascot, long’n short scarves is really nothing. W/o asking around there (I did here) I felt even this might be too bold. Felt good to express, break out, have a lill comfort (too tight at the neck). I’ve begun on shoes-to-boots now too. I have a thought out read-phrase if I get stares on them about ‘protection on the motorcycle out front’ as I just dont like the small ankle lows.

 

[Charalampos21]

Me too, but decently, I decided to decluter. There is no point to keep so many clothes.

 

[chrlsful]

I would love to advise for summer.

(I read this as “I’d like some advise”)
for ideas see post #30. Just think the 4 seasons in the cat.s listed (venues: wrk, school, nite out; several ‘ensambles’, etc.) Its really all I have to offer. After a look back, any Qs, just ask me (or others here...

 

[chrlsful]

no, they tell. Here a bro “suggests”...

 

[William Hodges]

I've been trying to 'revamp' my wardrobe for months now. I thought I was over all my jeans and t-shirts so I slowly started replacing them with trousers, more dressy style pants, and more button down shirts, kind of a dark academia vibe. Now I've accumulated more clothing I don't like. I can only afford 2-3 pieces every two weeks or so. I have tons of jeans that don't fit, pants that feel too dressy. I've been tucking my t-shirts into dressy pants and I just feel so stupid. I have one belt, and a bunch of sneakers that feel too sporty. I don't feel like I'm dressing like myself, I feel like I'm trying to imitate someone and doing a bad job. I feel like I need to start over, but I can't just get rid of all my clothes, I need something. Should I build a capsule wardrobe? What should I do?

Many of us have dealt with this phenomenon as we age and our tastes/styles change. I deal with it by looking at people (famous and otherwise) who have a very similar physical build/colouring and styles that I admire. I then find out what clothing brands they gravitate towards and begin researching and experimenting with those brands or comparable brands, taking time to try different clothes and colours that suit me.

For example, my physical build, colouring, and hairstyle are similar to Daniel Craig's. Like many, I grew up being a fan of James Bond. After seeing Craig in his first Bond movie, I was hooked on most clothing, accessories, and colours they styled on him. It may seem hokey, but it was like finding a personal stylist for myself, and it has worked.

Various companies offer online clothing subscriptions to fit every budget. These subscriptions send you choices you preselect and want to try on in the comfort of your own home. You only purchase the items you wish to keep and return the ones you do not like after trying them. For many, this offers an opportunity to keep your wardrobe fresh without breaking the bank while allowing you to discover new styles you enjoy. It is a great way to experiment and learn.

Also, do not be afraid to talk to people with a fashion sense you admire and ask them for advice and ideas (like you are doing here, but it is even better when you are face-to-face). When I was in high school and later in university, I made friends with beautiful young ladies and would ask them to go clothes shopping with me, piquing their thoughts on what they would like to see me wear. Attractive women enjoy being seen in public with handsome men and are usually quite good at helping you look your best if you ask them. Most of them know and understand quality (quality does not necessarily have to mean it is obscenely expensive).

Another thing is to get to know an excellent professional tailor. They have great secrets for updating an existing wardrobe and possess the skills to help you achieve that.

These might be some ideas worth considering.